Apparently, Senator John McCain of Arizona, furious about Mexican immigration, has contacted Canadian Liberal MP, Ruby Dhalla to discuss a mutual arrangement to stem the flow of illegal immigrants into the United States. An unidentified source said, “McCain really likes the proposed Canadian Bill C-428 that reduces the waiting time, from ten years to three, for Canadian immigrants to get Canadian Pension benefits. Senator McCain would like to get Canada to extend Bill C-428 to include illegal Mexican immigrants into the US so that they could travel right on through to Canada.” A McCain assistant said, “Initially, it would increase visitor traffic into Canada – which has been lagging lately – and over the long-term bolster Canada’s growing need for cheap labor.” He added, “It would be a win-win – the US would win by reducing the number of illegal immigrants, and the Mexican immigrants would win by getting a piece of Canadian taxpayers’ pensions.” When asked how Canada would win he replied, “Well … taxpayers would lose but the farmers, especially those in the Holland Marsh area would have a huge source of cheap labor for years to come.” Sources say that Ruby Dhalla, fearing a Canadian taxpayer backlash, is considering the proposal. A Dhalla assistant said, “on background” that including Mexicans might appeal to Canadians because so many go to Mexico for vacation and have shared many shots of tequila with many Mexicans – mainly bartenders.” She added, “And we’re considering a supplementary program whereby the new, illegal Mexican immigrants could get early citizenship if they fill jobs that Canadians are not good at … like playing in Mariachi Bands or drinking Tequila.
Stephen Harper is said to be cancelling his Mexican vacation in order to field all the angry emails coming in from Canadians. He encouraged all Canadians to send as many emails as possible to their MP, urging rejection of the bill.